Rarely do relationships ever end on an amicable note. Most of the time the breakupee doesn’t even know that the breakupper was unhappy, but lately I’ve been stuck in first date land. I swear one of these days i’m going to write a tell all book called SERIOUSLY!!! But this conundrum gave me an idea… what if I take all you happily hooked up folks back to a time when you were forced to play mind games with the opposite sex?!? Only now technology runs the game, so you have to swipe right, chat first, go fish, and above all, cross your fingers and hope for the best. Tired yet? Because I am exhausted.

Dating isn’t dating anymore.

Nope, we’ve been thrust into this meat market of online satisfaction. Yep, you literally have seconds to impress with a picture and profile (but everybody knows nobody reads those). So if your pic floats their boat you begin the fun game of endless texting banter, and this can go on for weeks where you just exchange one emoji filled message after another. Can’t wait to sit my children down someday and tell them how I fell in love over a winky face.

There are very specific rules when it comes to dating do’s and don’ts.

Not sure when the idea of honesty went out the window, but playing “the game” seems to be the way to someones heart these days. Don’t text too much. Don’t have sleepovers too early. Always bend the truth just a little. Don’t come across too eager. Don’t be too available. Always wait three days. And NEVER use words like commitment or marriage too soon.

We have become technology-obsessed.

PREACH!!!

But you know what, bring on the good the bad and the ugly, because at the end of the day, what doesn’t kill me will just end up in my tell all book someday.

And until then I have my Sweet Potato Tahini Bowl to fill that special place in my heart.